I have a really hard time sleeping, as I've mentioned before. Along with my inability to sleep I also have a bit of an anxiety problem. My anxiety is usually like background noise and I don't really notice it but lately I've come to realize that the more stress I'm under the worse my anxiety gets which makes it so I can't sleep. It's really a vicious cycle since the worse I sleep the more stressed I am the next day.
Another thing I've recently noticed is that when my anxiety levels are high and I'm stressed I get really paranoid. I start worrying about all the things that could happen to Violet and what would happen if there were an intruder or a fire and it really starts to freak me out. Some nights I have to physically go get her and have her sleep in our bed just so my mind will calm down a smidge. This always annoys Violet's daddy. Violet is not a calm sleeper and she'll kick you and roll over and slap you in the face with her arm. She'll also sleep for like 2 hours and then wake up and want to play with you or push daddy out of the bed. I think she feels like he's too big to be in bed with us or something like that. She may just want his pillows all to herself.
I really wish I could hook up a machine that can show you what people are thinking visually. Professor Von Drake made one in some Disney movie I watched. My mind races so much it just makes me wonder what's going through Violet's head and what she thinks about things. She's pretty good at verbalizing what she's thinking but it may not be the whole story or she may not know how to say something she's thinking. It'd be really helpful to have for babies so you can give them exactly what they want even down to the type of food they want. Actually I could use that now to figure out what Violet wants for lunch since she won't tell me! Oh well.... One can dream...
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